WTF of the Day

WTF?

Sienna Miller has been painting with her breasts. The on-again-off-again sweetie of Jude Law has been in character to play Edie Sedgwick, one of Andy Warhol’s entourage, in “Factory Girl” and she’s been using her breasts to paint large canvases, which she has displayed in her London home. She explains: “I’ve got rooms covered in [bleeps].” [Source]

Blargh. I hate Sienna......like we really nee to know this. Ooh, she's such a trendsetter (and such a better role model than Kate Moss, if only we could all be as edgy and method as her.) Double Blargh.

My Shambling Baby....

...is going to jail (okay, maybe, and yeah this one was obviously coming)

But he's bringing the fans with him (another maybe, since I doubt Pete Doherty's fans are the court going types....y'know, like lawyers and stuff)

Innyhoo.....he interrupted a concert to invite his fans to court with him (and help him fight for the right to party?)

P.S. Wow, it was a huge oversight on my part to omit Pete from the post below! He's mos defs a contender for my favorite cokehead.

A Few of My Favorite Cokeheads...

Hm, it seems that I haven't really been keeping y'alls updated on what's going on with Kate "the Great" Moss

....this because I'm so ovah all this "blah blah blah she's a bad role model and a cradle robber" shite. Or as (another) London Cokehead would say....

Note to the British Police : Leave Kate the fuck alone , she hasn't done anything wrong apart from snort a few lines " Ooooo is that illegal or something ", do something useful like arrest some crack dealers or street muggers. If I can sit in a cafe on Portobello Rd and watch them operate, surely you can.. Or is that too much like hard work nowadays for you all ??

P.S. I'm kind of totally addicted to this Cokehead guy......he's fucking hilarious.

SARK ATTACK: PART DEUX!

Um....it's part deux b/c when I typed in "Sark" the little prompt-y thing was all "hows about 'Sark Attack'" and I was like "Damn, that's clever.....too bad I already used it!" Wait......I have an idea of how I could make a whole new popular MTV series without coming up with another title because I'm LAZY! Um, I mean blog post title.....y'know what I haven't had ANY caffiene ALL DAY.....I think I'm just naturally like this. *Le Sigh*

TV Guide’s Shawna Malcom of has learned that the producers of the newly cancelled “Alias” are mulling a spinoff series:

Among the formats Pinkner and Abrams have discussed is a spin-off series revolving around villains Sark (David Anders), Peyton (Amy Acker) and Sloane (Ron Rifkin). "It's the triumvirate of evil!" Pinkner says. (No official discussions with ABC have taken place yet.)

They also talk about their hopes for a big-screen “Alias” movie, and about their desire to bring back Will Tippen and the evil Francie for what’s left of the final season, here. [Source]

But Seriously.............that has to be like the most intense Sark Attack ever! Me and Megan have been waiting for a Sark spinoff 4eva!!!! (And despite a deep and abiding hatred of Amy Acker left over from her incredible lameness on Angel, I'm willing to take what I can get.

Brokeback Moustache

I finally went to see Brokeback Mountain
yesterday and after having heard many reviews both positive (Perez Hilton) and negative (Ted Casablancas) I must say that I was shocked (shocked!) that no one said anything about that crime of a moustache inflicted on Jake Gyllenhaal's face about 1/2way through the movie.

My point being that if you're going because you want to see two hot cowboys, you may be sorely disappointed. However, if one hot cowboy is good enough for you than feast your eyes on this! I <3 Heath 4eva!

P.S. If sad endings are too much for your tender soul (or your unwaterproof mascara) I suggest you walk out say....10 or so minutes early and read Simon Doonan's alternate happy ending instead.

Who Dat?

Seriously, who in the world would wear tight white pants when they have their period?

(Or, at least I'm assuming that she has her period since there aren't really any alternatives..........except perhaps the whole "I spilled my pomegranate juice on my crotch" excuse which is just lame because EVERYBODY knows you should drink apple juice when you wear your white pants. Sheesh.)

Click Complete Post to see the fashion victim of the day.....



Yup, it's not Kimberly Stewart it's not even Paris Hilton: it's Mischa Barton giving the two aforementioned skanks a run for their "terrible terrible taste" money.

Ew, not to mention she's also wearing a T-shirt from her incredibly lame boyfriend's incredibly lame band. Talk about a bad day.

HospitaLohan

Um, apparently my ability to make snappy post titles has been sucked out of my like schools sucks away my happiness: SLUUUUUURP

Innyhoo, according to People

Lindsay Lohan was admitted to a Miami hospital Monday night after suffering a severe asthma attack and is now “resting comfortably,” a source close to the actress tells PEOPLE.

An asthma attack, hm? So I guess "asthma" is the new "exhaustion". And if you ask me, lil' LiMoLo looks like she's been hitting the asthma pretty hard lately, begging the question: will 2006 usher in some more hot rehab action. I mean 2005 was pretty rehab-apaloozaish itself what with (off the top of my head) Kate Moss, Donatella Versace, and Pete Doherty (sorta) all heading to Arizona. Still, I think we can expect even bigger things from 2006!

Junk Attack, Mothafuckas!

Yea! Just returned from loooong vacay involving cranky family, bitchy airport personnel, missed connections, and lost luggage....what's one thing that can make 2006 look better?

JUNK FEUD IS FINALLY BACK!!!

Yea! I've missed Junk Feud soooo much and I was worried she wasn't coming back.....although, orange? Is that really better than pink? I think not, but (other than that one little quibble) I have no complaints.

So, um that's all I know about what I missed while I was gone, but really I think that Junk Feud's relaunch is the only important thing that I could have so missed.

For the Marissa Cooper in Your Life

...Or the Kirsten Cohen, although she tends to go straight for the bottle. And by the way, if you don't get these random references you can assume that you're just super-cool and have no time to waste on the O.C.

This cell-phone shaped flask is Style.com's Item of the Week (click for larger image so you can read the caption, it's really quite reasonably priced) as perfect for, "quick nips in the limo" and "spiking inadequate punch at a New Year's party."

Sheesh, the O.C. and Vogue both are just such bad influences on me. I should go back to watching Gilmore Girls instead.

Kate (The Only "Moss" In Our Woods)

I am totally obsessed with this necklace (and its name) Plus, I think it's time my jewelry collection expanded beyond the constraints of Urban Outfitters, I mean the Laguna Beachers buy jewelry at Urban Outfitters and even I know better than to follow their fashion example.

Anyway, considering that Kate's price is quite reasonable ($54) I think I should buy myself the gold one for Hannukah and the silver one for Christmas.

Ah, the joys of being a halfsie

[Alex + Chloe handy online shopping for my presents, wink wink nudge nudge]
[Today's Obsession....even my obsessions aren't original FWD].

Fashion Disaster

"THE cost of a transit strike to department stores and designer boutiques in New York during the week before Christmas and Hanukkah will undoubtedly be staggering. The cost to the greater cause of fashion could be even worse."

When perusing the NY Times, I rarely actually read the articles because of the air of droning voices and and utter boredom that their little blurbs manage to exude.......yet occasionally I run across something so frighteningly important that am I persuaded to actually click through the kajillion pages the article consists of. Really, with a hook like this, how can I resist?

In this time of trouble the NY Times is spotting a resurgence of terrible fashion faux pas such as "weird, leotardy types of things and oversize purple Patagonia sweatshirts." You think that's silly? Are you thinking that the Times is being just a tad overdramatic, but wait,

It was, after all, the transit strike in 1980 that led millions of New Yorkers to walk to work wearing business suits with running shoes, usually white. It was a look born of practicality, but one that commuters refused to cede when that strike ended, as if their long-term comfort was another chip on the union's bargaining table. Thus was born one of the worst fashion trends ever.

White sneakers with business suits! Arrrrrghhhhh, we cannot let another national disaster like that one occur! Damn unions! Those kerflingin' ungrateful socialists are at the root of all fashion evil.

[A Sense of Fashion is Lost in Transit NY Times]

Snack Attack, Mothafuckas!

Oh God, I think I just died laughing. Best SNL short since Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze were auditioning for Chip 'N Dales. This is my life (minus that HOT jacket)

BritNeyNSeAn4eVa

Um, this made me feel very bad about how much I care for the well being of "BritNeyNSeAn"....but hopefully you are cool enough to enjoy it guilt-free.

BritNeyNSeAn4eVa (2:28:21 AM): hell ya. a tiger don't change his spots. he cheated on his babymomma so u cant tell me he won't cheat on Brit. she needs to think about her baby since she's a momma now. i seen it happen to my friend her baby's daddy went back to his old girlfriend before my friend had her baby and now he don't talk to her or see the baby or nuthin :(
BritNeyNSeAn4eVa (2:28:52 AM): and hes ugly 2.

You can read the whole "IMterview" here, but I found this little excerpt to be a perfect encapsulation of what I find wrong with Kevin. As Hailee puts it so eloquently, "a tiger don't change his spots."

[Snark City]

Leo Shops at Victoria's Secret

........for the models that is.

I totally take back what I said about feeling sorry for Leonardo DiCaprio because Gisele had moved on to someone who is actually hot.

Leo is supposedly with this 20 year-old Victoria's Secret model.
Um, so I guess that means Leo is over it too.

[Source]

Jenny Shimizu vs. Maddox Jolie

Um, I guess all we can conclude is that Angelina Jolie thinks mohawks are hot.

Watch for Brad and Zahara to get mohawked very very soon, considering that Angie appears to control the lives of everyone around her.

[Rumours are People Too Fashion Addict Diary]

The Worst Best-Dressed

Vogue, how could you do this to me?

Sienna Miller "starring" in your best dressed January issue.........is this how you want to start off our year? On a lame, copycat, slept-her-way-to-fame note?

Oh, and when you refer to her as a "Headline Maker" and a "Rule Breaker" I assume you're referring to the headlines she made when her famous boyfriend cheated on her and the rules she broke by following Kate Moss's style down to every last hat, flat, and jean.

I assume Vogue just stuck Sienna on the cover because she's a "famous actress" who is more likely to sell magazines than say, someone with original style, but it still hurts.

[Obsessed With Best Dressed FWD]

Paint the Stars Black

Not to talk about only Chanel or anything, but how gorgeous are five black Chanel outfits all in a row? Certainly too gorgeous to leave languishing on Teen Vogue's hit or miss page, because sometimes I doubt your commitment to annoyingly undersized magazines.

(Ashley Olsen, Mia Maestro, Diane Kruger, Lindsay Lohan, and Amanda Hearst) It almost makes me not hate Mia Maestro (not quite though, I still kind of blame her for the downfall of Alias)

[images from Teen Vogue]

Dear New Face of Chanel,

First of all, puh-leeze don't get used to me calling you that all the time or anything because I'm getting very tired, very fast of you flaunting this new contract in our faces all the time.

Rule #1 As a face of Chanel you are expected to look good all the time.

Rule #2 Yes, you are expected to show some Chanel love, but (and this is a big butt) never at the risk of making it look ugly.

That said, please never pull a stunt like this one where you drape your self in advertisements, and fail MISERABLY at making it look good! Now, I know this sounds a little harsh, Linds, but you are no longer representing yourself, you are representing CHANEL.

No Lindsay, DON'T try to explain yourself. You are a bad enough influence on your little sister as it is--btw, EW, ALIANA, go to your room and change NOW--and I think we all know how hard it is to overcome sisters with bad taste. Besides (since I refuse to sully this post with pictures of you making a fashion victim of yourself) I posted a picture of you doing the Chanel right, and you look very purty here. Thank you, that is all.

<3 LCP

Don't Call it a Comeback

....or do, whatever. Either way go watch Kate Moss's ad for Virgin Mobile.

Um, but don't enter the contest to win a phone signed by her because I already did and I want to win

.....although here I go telling you so apparently my subconscious has already given and decided I can't win. Although on the other hand, I didn't put a direct link to the contest, so I guess if you really want to enter you're going to have to go find it yourself! MWA HA HA HA!

Hi, I'm on Crack.

As in, "Hi, I'm on Project Runway for the 2nd time, my name is Daniel Franco, and I. Am. On. Crack"

Yuck, please God make Daniel go away or I might go apeshit on Katrina's TV the next time he faces the camera and quivers like the high-strung rabbit he is.

Gross. Go away and come back when you're clean Daniel. I don't think Bravo can handle you and Whitney Houston at the same time.

[Images from FourFour's (brazilliant as usual) recap]